What is Your Why?

WHAT IS YOUR WHY?

Long before Simon Sinek came out with his book Start with Why, the question mentioned above was being asked every month by yours truly in new student orientations. I was the Career Services Director for a school teaching Allied Health courses and each month, a new cohort of perspective students would attend orientation about the school. This was the final step before they officially signed up and started with us. The school President was first to speak, and I was last. I guess he saw me as the closer. I saw myself as the last person to make sure they knew what they were getting into. I won’t go into the entire speech, but the highlights will be touched on here to help our fellow tribes members continue on the path in our quest for all things up.

What is your why? Everyone has whys. Some would call whys reasons. I think that is too simple. Remembering something my 8th
grade English teacher taught me (shout out to you Mrs. Fritz), nouns need verbs. Things need actions. That simple lesson has helped guide me through a whole host of troubles, trials, tribulations, and decisions that have shaped who I am today. Things need actions. To put it another way…

Your what needs a why.

If we don’t know why we are doing something, do we truly do it with our whole heart? Are we our best self at work or performing a task if we don’t have the why as our true north? Whys take many shapes, sizes, and names. We need to truly take some time and focus, refocus, and focus again on our whys to make sure we are doing what we truly need to be doing. Sometimes whys are just because we are sick and tired of being sick and tired of where we are. Sometimes, it’s because we have more month than money. Often, our whys aren’t places or things, but rather people. My biggest why is my 13-year-old son. Everything I do is with the very specific intent of helping to shape that little man to become a big man (even though he is already almost as tall as me) with a strong moral compass and very big dreams.

What is your why? Who or what are the things that shape your actions? Fellow Tribe of Up friends, I would humbly ask you to take a few moments this week to think about your whys. If they are situations you are trying to get out of, refocus and rededicate yourself to getting out of it as soon as possible. If your why is a person or people, let me ask this question. Do they know it? Last week I wrote about thank you notes. Is there a better reason to write one than to let someone know they are your why?

It has been my experience that whys love to know they are whys. It makes people feel good they are so highly thought of. At the graduation ceremonies we held twice a year at the aforementioned school, I had so many graduates come up and introduce their whys to me. That is how they would introduce them too.

“Mr. Steve, I want you to meet my whys.”

Those moments are memories I hope to have forever. I was so proud of those graduates. Not because they finished the program. Not because they had the skills to go out into the job market and be successful. Nope. I was proud because we gave them the best tool of all. They found, kept, and treasured their whys. Nouns need verbs. With all respect to Mrs. Fritz, allow me to change that around just a little.

Verbs require nouns. Actions, actions that result in the types of positive outcomes we seek, require nouns to help us achieve them. Whats need whys. What is your why? Dear friends, don’t be afraid to tell them. What if you are someone else’s why? Are you a good why or are you a great one? Telling someone they are your why is a good thing. There is no pressure. It’s an honor. It’s a deposit in a world where everything wants to take a withdrawal. Let them know. Let that light shine brightly. Don’t keep it hidden. Letting a noun know they are the reason you try so hard at your verb (Mrs. Fritz would be so proud of that last sentence) creates the kind of deposits that fill emotional bank accounts for a lifetime. Write them a note. Tell them to their face. If your why isn’t a person, write it down. Make it a thing you see every day. Tell it every day. If your whys are people, tell them. Thank them for being your why.

Take that Simon Sinek!

Steve Gwisdalla is a Dexter resident. He is the Owner, Chief Up Officer, and Vice President of Whys at BetterPlace Consulting, a success and career coaching firm. If you lost your why, reach out to Steve to help you find it again at steve@betterplacemgmt.com