The Quiet Battles They Still Fight

On a warm Thursday night, inside a quiet room at the Five Healthy Towns office in Chelsea, a few chairs are arranged in a circle. There is no podium. No microphones. No medals. Just people—veterans, firefighters, law enforcement, emergency medical—sitting down beside each other, speaking words that most of us could never begin to understand.

There’s a name for this gathering: Pro Allies. But what it really is… is a place where the war doesn’t have to be hidden anymore.

Rev. Rodney Gasaway leads the group. He’s a military veteran, a chaplain, a pastor. He rides a motorcycle with a patch on his vest that says so. And it’s that patch—the one that reads “Chaplain” just beneath “Veteran of Foreign Wars”—that invites more conversation than you’d expect at the gas pump or a grocery store.

“They come up to me,” he says. “Strangers. They just start talking. About their service. About their guilt. About their nightmares. About things they’ve never told anyone before.”

He nods. “It’s not always combat stuff. It’s taking care of a loved one. A struggling marriage. Raising kids while carrying too much. But the thing is—when you’ve lived through trauma—regular life hits different. You feel like you’re still in a fight.”

Rodney understands. In the Navy, he was a firefighter on the flight deck of an aircraft carrier. One day, a young sailor he had trained—only 19—misstepped in protocol during a ship fire. A pressure door slammed shut with brutal force. The young man was killed instantly. Two others were burned. And Rodney—just 21 at the time—carried that with him for decades.

“It wasn’t my fault,” he says. “But it was my trainee. And that kind of weight doesn’t care about fault. It just lives in you.”

Rodney eventually found healing through ministry, through counseling, through faith. But more importantly, he found a way to create a space for others to begin that same journey. That’s how Pro Allies was born—a peer support group where no one has to explain acronyms, or feel ashamed for crying, or pretend they’re fine just to protect their job.

Because here’s the thing: veterans and first responders are trained to push through pain. They’re told to keep it buttoned up. And even when they’re encouraged to seek help, many worry that doing so might cost them promotions or respect. So they suffer in silence.

And it’s killing them.

According to Rodney, more first responders die from suicide each year than in the line of duty. The U.S. loses 22 veterans, active duty, and reservist to suicide every day. That’s approximately 23 heroes gone every 24 hours—not in combat or in the line of duty, but in kitchens, basements, and parked cars. Quietly. Alone.

So Pro Allies gives them something they haven’t had: each other.

At the meetings—held on the second and fourth Thursdays of the month—there’s no agenda. No forced vulnerability. Just conversation, honesty, and space. One person might share something terrible from years ago. Another might just sit and listen. But they all nod. They all understand. And no one looks away.

“It’s not therapy,” Rodney says. “But it’s healing.”

The group is open to veterans, law enforcement, firefighters, EMS, and their immediate families. And for those who aren’t in that world but still want to help, there’s a role too. Pro Allies connects “professional allies”—civilians who commit to daily prayer—with anonymous veterans or responders in need of support. One name. One purpose. Quiet compassion.

As Memorial Day approaches, we’ll gather in parks. We’ll wave flags. We’ll lay wreaths and say words of thanks for the fallen. And we should. But maybe we could also remember this: the battle doesn’t always end overseas.

Sometimes, it comes home. Sometimes, it lingers. And sometimes, the strongest thing a soldier or first responder can do… is speak.

Rodney Gasaway will be there, vest on, patch visible. He’s still listening. Still praying. Still fighting—just in a different way now.

And for the heroes among us who aren’t quite done with their war, he’s saving them a seat.

Learn more at www.proallies.org. Pro Allies is a ministry of the United Methodist Church that meets the 2nd and 4th Thursday of each month, 6:30–8:00 p.m. at Five Healthy Towns in Chelsea. Open to veterans, first responders, and their families. Pro Allies offers online videos of veterans and first responders who have agreed to share their stories in the hope of helping someone else who is struggling.