Dexter’s Own Lori Tucker-Sullivan Brings Rock Widows Story Home

Former Dexter resident Lori Tucker-Sullivan returns to share the emotional journey behind her acclaimed book on the wives of rock legends.

Photo: Author Lori Tucker-Sullivan with Ingrid Croce, widow of Jim Croce, holding the iconic photo of Jim taken during the photo shoot for his Life and Times album (photo by Jimmy Rock)

On April 23 at 7:00 p.m., former Dexter resident and acclaimed author Lori Tucker-Sullivan will return to town to present her widely praised book I Can’t Remember If I Cried: Rock Widows on Life, Love and Legacy at the Dexter District Library. The event, held in the Library’s lower-level meeting room, will feature Tucker-Sullivan sharing behind-the-scenes stories and reflections from the book in conversation style with local books and media expert Rich Fahle, a Chelsea resident and former producer of PBS Books.

Tucker-Sullivan, who now lives in Detroit, spent years in Dexter with her late husband, Kevin, during which they renovated the historic Henes farmhouse in Dexter Township. After Kevin’s passing in 2010, she eventually sold the home, saying, “It was time for a young family to be in the house again.” The loss set her on a journey through grief and reinvention—one that unexpectedly led her back to her first love: music writing.

“I started thinking, there’s got to be more widows like this, because there were so many musicians that died young,” she said. Inspired by a radio segment on Yoko Ono during a drive to a writing class, Tucker-Sullivan began compiling a list of rock musicians who died young and the women they left behind. “By the end of the night, I had a handwritten list of around 22 musicians who had passed away fairly young, and who left spouses.”

What began as a simple list quickly turned into a deeply personal and transformative quest. Tucker-Sullivan began reaching out to the women, many of whom had never been asked to share their side of the story. “They all really wanted to share that and to have it out there,” she said. Some interviews took place over the phone, while others brought her across the country—and even across the Atlantic. She met with widows in their homes, recording studios, and memorial sites, each encounter offering not only insight into the legacy of a beloved musician but also the private strength and resilience of the women left behind.

The book that emerged from this idea tells the stories of 14 women, including Gloria Jones (partner of T. Rex’s Marc Bolan), Judy Van Zant (widow of Lynyrd Skynyrd’s Ronnie Van Zant), and Crystal Zevon (former wife of Warren Zevon). The journey, both personal and professional, took Tucker-Sullivan around the world to capture their stories—sometimes literally.

“She called me from Africa, from Sierra Leone,” Tucker-Sullivan said of Jones, who was running a music and film school for war orphans. “I was amazed that she would respond.”

Among the stories featured in I Can’t Remember If I Cried is that of Ingrid Croce, widow of beloved singer-songwriter Jim Croce, known for hits like “Time in a Bottle” and “Operator.” Ingrid welcomed Tucker-Sullivan into her home, where they sat near the iconic photo of Jim that graced his album covers. Her story, like many others in the book, offers a deeply personal look at preserving a legacy while navigating profound loss.

The stories in I Can’t Remember If I Cried don’t just explore grief—they also examine strength, legacy, and how women are often sidelined in the male-dominated music industry. “When you layer the misogyny of the music industry on top of the misogynistic framework around being a widow, it’s really quite something,” said Catherine Mayer, widow of Andy Gill (Gang of Four), in one of the book’s most powerful quotes.

Tucker-Sullivan hopes the event at the Dexter District Library will be a meaningful conversation for music fans and anyone who has experienced loss. “There’s a lot of grief, you know, discussions about grief and how we get past that, and then their individual stories as well,” she said. “If you love music, music history, it’s really a great book.”

The title itself—I Can’t Remember If I Cried—is drawn from the Don McLean song American Pie, about the tragic plane crash that took the lives of Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, and the Big Bopper. “Don McLean was quite happy to grant permission for that, and he loves the title of the book,” Tucker-Sullivan said.

The book was named one of Library Journal’s Best Nonfiction Books of 2024 and has resonated with a broad audience.

Tucker-Sullivan will read excerpts from her book, discuss the women she interviewed, and reflect on the lessons she learned about forgiveness, identity, and healing. “Forgiveness at this point isn’t for him, it’s for me,” she said, quoting Crystal Zevon. “It’s the best thing to do.”

Registration for the event is appreciated but not required. For more information or to register, visit the Dexter District Library website or call 734-426-4477 ext. 120. Copies of I Can’t Remember If I Cried will be available for purchase and signing after the presentation.